A man hasn\u2019t been feeling well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete checkup.
\nAfterward, the doctor comes out with the results.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m afraid I have some very bad news,\u201d the doctor says. \u201cYou\u2019re dying, and you don\u2019t have much time left.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, that\u2019s terrible!\u201d says the man. \u201cHow long have I got?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cTen,\u201d the doctor says sadly.<\/p>\n
\u201cTen?\u201d the man asks. \u201cTen what? Months? Weeks? What?!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNine\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
A man goes to the doctor and says, \u201cDoctor, wherever I touch, it hurts.\u201d
\nThe doctor asks, \u201cWhat do you mean?\u201d<\/p>\n
The man says, \u201cWhen I touch my shoulder, it really hurts. If I touch my knee \u2013<\/p>\n
OUCH! When I touch my forehead, it really, really hurts.\u201d<\/p>\n
The doctor says, \u201cI know what\u2019s wrong with you \u2013 you\u2019ve broken your finger!\u201d<\/p>\n
Patient 1: \u2018Why did you run away from the operation table?\u2019
\nPatient 2: \u2018The nurse was repeatedly saying \u2018don\u2019t get nervous\u2019, \u2018don\u2019t be afraid\u2019, \u2018be strong\u2019, \u2018this is a small operation only\u2019, and things like that.\u2019<\/p>\n
Patient 1: \u2018So what was wrong in that? Why were you so afraid?\u2019<\/p>\n
Patient 2: \u2018She was talking to the surgeon!\u2019<\/p>\n
A doctor walks into a room full of patients at a mental institution,
\ntakes out a pen, and draws a door on the wall. He then tells all the patients that whoever wants to escape should use that door.<\/p>\n
Immediately, they all rush towards it, but of course cannot go through.<\/p>\n
However, one patient sits still at the back with a smile on his face. He has not moved at all.<\/p>\n
The doctor thinks he must have been cured. He then asks the patient why he did not rush to the door, and the patient whispers, \u201cThey don\u2019t know that I\u2019m the one who has the key.\u201d<\/p>\n
A 90 year old women goes to the doctor.
\n\u201cDr I can\u2019t stop farting, sure they don\u2019t smell and make no noise but still i can\u2019t take it any more.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell take these pills every day and come back in a week.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDr what did you do to me not only am I still farting now they smell as well!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh very well , now about your hearing\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A man hasn\u2019t been feeling well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete checkup. Afterward, the doctor comes out with the results. \u201cI\u2019m afraid I… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":995,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-994","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-news"],"yoast_head":"\n